The scooby snack teaches the tornado. Any lover can share a shower with the cloud formation inside the tomato, but it takes a real recliner to bury the moldy globule. A tape recorder seeks a sandwich. When you see the ski lodge, it means that the tattered customer goes to sleep. The underhandedly fractured mortician secretly plans an escape from a nearest industrial complex a fire hydrant, and the plaintiff from the cashier makes love to a carelessly nuclear tape recorder.

Is there anyone among the younger crowd of shinobi capable of translating this for him…?

It’d been…a year at least. Mika had come back from an escort mission, which had spanned eight months, been holed up working and generally hadn’t made much time except for a select few people. They happened to spot Itachi some distance away on the street. Several moments passed before they approached. “Itachi?” They looked tired, much more than the last time they spoke.

Many knew his name, though, selective as Itachi was, there were very few he would return the favor for.

Especially if they more or less disappeared from his life. Eight months wasn’t that long, but it was long for someone who focused so much on a singular goal as much as him.

This person is vaguely familiar…

“Yes…?”

Who is your favorite between Itachi and Sasuke?

[[ I……I can’t choose. Anon why would you do this to me. ]]

The sad thing about Naruto tbh is that it’s shounen. It’s pointless to try and view it with too much realism and that’s frustrating for the fans that already reached adulthood xD I would pay for a super political, dark and nasty remake of it, even if it were just a novel. Imagine the awesome.

[[ It…is political, though. I mean, just look at the novels. I mean try to look at it with more realism when it comes to things like cultural views, societal expectations, and hygiene. Like– all the promos for the naruto-stage have the costumes and the actors dirty as SHIT. And I love that. ]]

Is it odd that I liked that they didn’t have hair except on their heads? I easily fantasized with not having to deal with hair 😂 but Kishi would avoid things that were unnecessarily complicated to keep drawing and I’ve always been fine with that.

[[ Ehh, I don’t like that. I mean– I can excuse it for a couple characters because of circumstances where it would actively benefit them to have no body hair except for their heads or who are just weird enough to be like that, but not for the majority of the shinobi population. Imagining Itachi to be cleanly shaven at all times is just….unsettling, actually. Let my son be natural :C ]]

I also find it amusing that anime men have no hair on their legs, I bet Itachi does but not a whole lot since japanese men are not real hairy. Thanks again for answering ill quit harrasing you with these gross Q’s

[[ I don’t find them gross, it’s ok! I love these kinds of questions, honestly. I like to apply more serious realism to Naruto, as opposed to the common beautification we see.

I can understand why anime men mostly don’t have hair– it’s easier to draw. And when men do have hair drawn on it’s to emphasize they’re a lot hairier than normal.

You are correct, though, Japanese men typically don’t grow a whole lot of body hair, but Itachi still has a normal amount for a man of his descent.

~~I’m still annoyed Kishi refuses to draw nipples and pit hair. Let me have my godamn men.~~ ]]

I think on things like that such as hygiene. I find it attractive that itachi would smell and I bet his brother would too. But Itachi is my anime crush

[[ I find it more realistic. Like… we’ve never seen anything akin to deodorant get touched upon in universe. Perfume, maybe, but that’s extra. With how much these shinobi fight they likely stink like B/O all the time. ~~That’s why Kiba can track them so far.~~ ]]

Thank you for answering –everyone else was getting their panties in a twist.

[[ …Really? I’m going to assume this is about Itachi’s hygiene. Just…I’ve never played into the idea that Itachi has exceptional hygiene or something. He’s a traveling criminal in Akatsuki, people are constantly out for his life, plus he’s actively suicidal.

Itachi has never really given a shit about his appearance and he’s not about to start caring now. He’s not a walking shampoo commercial, and his skin ain’t squeaky clean. He likely goes days/weeks without bathing depending on the mission. It comes secondary. ]]

Is it true that in Texas 9 out of 10 vehicles in the street are pickup trucks and that seeing cowboys is common? (Ps. I expect it’s an exaggeration bc of the happy hour context I heard that in)

[[ Well, the point about the trucks is true. But I wouldn’t say the cowboy thing. ]]

If Itachi were reincarnated or if Sasuke had another child or came across a kid that resembled Itachi would he be biased, yes or yes? (xD maybe Boruto would have a reason to be jealous trolol jok)

[[ Let’s go over it by bullet point :U

“If Itachi were reincarnated, would Sasuke be biased?”

Abso-fuckin-lutely. He would be all over his brother. Boruto would probably be confused, and then automatically think Itachi was cool just because Uncle Sasuke gives him attention, so Itachi must be cool.

“If Sasuke had another child, would he be biased?”

No, sadly. There’s a bad track record with Sarada. That’s even if you manage to get past the thought of Sasuke having a second child, which he’s not about to.

“If Sasuke came across a child that resembled Itachi, would he be biased?”

Probably for a little while, purely because it would bring back memories. But it’s more than looks, he’d focus a little longer if the kid acted like Itachi too. But he would eventually get over it. And he definitely wouldn’t just up and make them a student of his, so Boruto would have no reason to be jealous. ]]